Now I know we all have bad days but why do I seem to feel like I always have more than most? Is there something majorly wrong with me? I admit it. I failed in my aim to be positive this month. I'm sorry to all my readers. I did make you a promise and I never achieved my goal. I guess deep down I knew I wouldn't last. I think I've known it from the very off. I'm just not a positive person and tend to see the negative in everything. Which I know is wrong. I know I need to stop being so down all the time but I don't know how to stop myself from feeling like this. Well actually I do and that's why I'm going to make a change.
You must be thinking, 'she says this all the time'. Which yes I do. But this time I'm getting proper help. I thought it's best that I tell yous all first as I really don't know how this is going to effect me or what I'm going to turn out like. Let's hope for the better and I suddenly gain a new lease of life. But to be honest you never can tell. But fingers crossed it will all be good. Anyway I've actually gotten round to doing what I've known for about 8 months I needed to do. I've booked myself a doctors appointment for Tuesday and with any luck they may be able to help me stop feeling so low all the time!
I do believe I may be depressed. Either that or I have severe anxiety/stress/OCD. Well in fact I have all of those two. Plus I know I still have eating issues as well, not so much in the sense that I've got an actual disorder but I'm still conscious. I guess it's something that I probably always will be though ever since my eating disorder when I was fourteen. But that's a whole other story. Connected to this. Possibly. The entire reason for this.Not even the slightest.
I'm hoping my going to see the doctor on Tuesday they might be able to offer me some sort of antidepressant. I know they say that antidepressants are a last resort but I really have tried everything else. I've tried counselling I've tried hypnotherapy. I've tried herbal remedies of all kinds. I've spoken to endless amounts of people and they're not making me any better. I need something to actually give me a boost! And let's fact it, how many people in the world do actually take them? Thousands. If not millions. They're not abnormal! And I won't be abnormal for having them. If anything they will be making me normal!
So I guess we'll just have to wait and see how I get on. I really hope they see how much I need them. It really is a case of need. Of course I will listen to their suggestions and discuss alternatives, but I really can't see any other alternative right now. So keep your fingers crossed for me!
Emily x
PS: If anyone else is in the same situation or had similar experiences or anything. I'd really appreciate some ideas and advice. Equally I'm happy to discuss my own experiences too!
Saturday, 17 August 2013
Thursday, 1 August 2013
Defeating your problems.. One dog's inspirational story
Hey everyone,
Well I posted yesterday about how I was determined to make August my month and one that will be the start of a whole new me. And in a way I kind of have as I'm refusing to give up just yet. I will admit I've not had the best of days though. My emotions have been a bit all over the place and things that shouldn't have been bothering me have. But I'm not going to dwell too much and trying not to be overly negative about it. After all things aren't the end of the world and there are a lot of people who have probably had a worse day than me.
See so I am slowly becoming more optimistic! Just think I usually would have continued to be negative and not even considered that anyone could be having a worse time than me! Nor would I have thought that I could improve the situatin in any way. So I really am trying!
So what has actually got me being so positive? Well apart from a more healthier attitude to everything I also have seen quite an inspirational video today. Now I'm not saying that this is the reason that my whole outlook on life has changed but it did make me feel quite emotional in a good way! It made me think that a lot of people and animals have a lot of difficulty in their daily lives through genuine physical problems. Where as all my issues are silly little things that are easily fixable. Some people can't just easily fix their problems. Not without a great deal of effort and determination and even then it's not always guaranteed.
To get what I'm really talking about you'll have to see this video. So here it is:
Is that not the most cutest and sweetest thing you've ever seen?
Well I thought so anyway! And it just goes to show that you really can defeat your problems! So that's exactly what I aim to do! :D
Let me know what you think about the video :)
Emily x
Well I posted yesterday about how I was determined to make August my month and one that will be the start of a whole new me. And in a way I kind of have as I'm refusing to give up just yet. I will admit I've not had the best of days though. My emotions have been a bit all over the place and things that shouldn't have been bothering me have. But I'm not going to dwell too much and trying not to be overly negative about it. After all things aren't the end of the world and there are a lot of people who have probably had a worse day than me.
See so I am slowly becoming more optimistic! Just think I usually would have continued to be negative and not even considered that anyone could be having a worse time than me! Nor would I have thought that I could improve the situatin in any way. So I really am trying!
So what has actually got me being so positive? Well apart from a more healthier attitude to everything I also have seen quite an inspirational video today. Now I'm not saying that this is the reason that my whole outlook on life has changed but it did make me feel quite emotional in a good way! It made me think that a lot of people and animals have a lot of difficulty in their daily lives through genuine physical problems. Where as all my issues are silly little things that are easily fixable. Some people can't just easily fix their problems. Not without a great deal of effort and determination and even then it's not always guaranteed.
To get what I'm really talking about you'll have to see this video. So here it is:
Is that not the most cutest and sweetest thing you've ever seen?
Well I thought so anyway! And it just goes to show that you really can defeat your problems! So that's exactly what I aim to do! :D
Let me know what you think about the video :)
Emily x
Wednesday, 31 July 2013
August... my best month yet!
Hello,
Okay I've decided that enough is enough. I need to stop being so negative all the time and start actually making myself happy. They say that only one person can ever make any change in life and I know that that person is me. So unless I sort myself out I never will be happy. I never will be successful or achieve my dreams. So now is the start of being positive.
I know I've done this little pep talk like four billion quadrazillion times before and then like the next day I'm back to my usual miserable, depressive, crying over everything and anything self. But I refuse to be like this anymore. I've got to remember that nothing is ever as bad as I think it is and that if I'm determined to fight through problems then I'm sure I can turn any issue into at least half the problem it originally was. Plus tomorrow is the start of August. This month is my month! I'm a typical Leo and have always thought of August as being the month that was made for me. Also I'm going to consider it the real start of my summer, seeing as I've wasted the rest of it with being too negative and not letting myself fully enjoy it.
Another reason I'm going with August is because I've actually got quite a few good things to look forward to this month. I mean I'm not exactly excited about my birthday as to be honest I don't actually want to turn 19! Yes that's right 19! I'm officially old! But anyway I guess it is still something that should be nice, especially as my birthday present is to see Wicked at London's Apollo Theater up the West End! Something I've been dying to see for the past 5 years!
Then at the end of the month I'm also going to see West Side Story at the Palace Theater in Southend. I've booked it partly because I think it will be good fun and a nice thing to see but also for my cousin's birthday (coincidentally the same day as mine!) Also it's a chance for me to actually spend some time with her, which is something I never do since going to uni!
I've also got a spa day with my Mum at Bannatynes Gym and Spa n the 2nd! Which will be lovely! We go their annually as it's what my Mum gets for her brithday from the company she works for and my Mum always kindly takes me with her! So this will be my third/forth time now and I can't wait! Both to use the gym as it's just nice! Can't wait for my run :D and then to relax in the sauna :) Then the best bit! Not one but two treatments!! I'm gonna be having a full body Swedish Massage and a facial!
Right I think that's enough talk about that right now! I'll save it all for another day!
But I'm making it known! Emily is going to be a happy and optimistic person (or at least I'll try to be anyway!)
Do any of you think I can do it? Or have any tips for me?
Emily x
Okay I've decided that enough is enough. I need to stop being so negative all the time and start actually making myself happy. They say that only one person can ever make any change in life and I know that that person is me. So unless I sort myself out I never will be happy. I never will be successful or achieve my dreams. So now is the start of being positive.
I know I've done this little pep talk like four billion quadrazillion times before and then like the next day I'm back to my usual miserable, depressive, crying over everything and anything self. But I refuse to be like this anymore. I've got to remember that nothing is ever as bad as I think it is and that if I'm determined to fight through problems then I'm sure I can turn any issue into at least half the problem it originally was. Plus tomorrow is the start of August. This month is my month! I'm a typical Leo and have always thought of August as being the month that was made for me. Also I'm going to consider it the real start of my summer, seeing as I've wasted the rest of it with being too negative and not letting myself fully enjoy it.
Another reason I'm going with August is because I've actually got quite a few good things to look forward to this month. I mean I'm not exactly excited about my birthday as to be honest I don't actually want to turn 19! Yes that's right 19! I'm officially old! But anyway I guess it is still something that should be nice, especially as my birthday present is to see Wicked at London's Apollo Theater up the West End! Something I've been dying to see for the past 5 years!
Then at the end of the month I'm also going to see West Side Story at the Palace Theater in Southend. I've booked it partly because I think it will be good fun and a nice thing to see but also for my cousin's birthday (coincidentally the same day as mine!) Also it's a chance for me to actually spend some time with her, which is something I never do since going to uni!
I've also got a spa day with my Mum at Bannatynes Gym and Spa n the 2nd! Which will be lovely! We go their annually as it's what my Mum gets for her brithday from the company she works for and my Mum always kindly takes me with her! So this will be my third/forth time now and I can't wait! Both to use the gym as it's just nice! Can't wait for my run :D and then to relax in the sauna :) Then the best bit! Not one but two treatments!! I'm gonna be having a full body Swedish Massage and a facial! Right I think that's enough talk about that right now! I'll save it all for another day!
But I'm making it known! Emily is going to be a happy and optimistic person (or at least I'll try to be anyway!)
Do any of you think I can do it? Or have any tips for me?
Emily x
Monday, 29 July 2013
Bloggers Aspiration/ Rant/ Negative Thoughts by me....
I really wish I was one of those people that sticks to their promises. I have the self control in some aspects. Like for instance I fill out an online food diary daily which tracks the nutritional information of what I eat and helps me watch what I eat. Probably both a good and bad thing to be truthful but still that's a post for another day. If I ever get round to it, that is.
You see my problem is that I'm always trying to do four billion different things at once and never get round to finishing anything. Like I never even finished explaining things that I do on a daily basis without fail. Another example being my little standard fitness regime that is just compulsory. Again another post for another day but basically it's a set routine of sit ups, push ups, planks and stretches that I spend at least 20 minutes of my day and if I don't I feel a bit awkward. Obsessive I know. But hey that's me.
So it really does beg the question... why can't I become just as obsessive with blogging? I guess it's because I go from one obsession to the next. Always have done (I think anyway) and think for the foreseeable future I always will do. Then I can sometimes break those little obsessions which is good in some cases but then I just seem to move on to something else.
I really hope that one day my obsession will be blogging because I know once I get into it I'll really be able to make a successful blog. One that's as good as all the other amazing ones I read. So many of the girls in the Her Campus blogger's network have such amazing blogs and it almost makes me depressed that I can't match them. Well I say can't. I can. I just don't. Or is it won't? Oh I don't know. Maybe I'll sort myself out. Maybe. Probably not anytime soon though.
Will I ever get my act together? Will I ever be the success I want to be?
Emily x
PS: Sorry for the post being all a bit too personal and negative. I know I know, I don't post for ages and when I do it's a personal rant in a way. I do deeply apologize to any readers out there. I will one day be better I promise!
You see my problem is that I'm always trying to do four billion different things at once and never get round to finishing anything. Like I never even finished explaining things that I do on a daily basis without fail. Another example being my little standard fitness regime that is just compulsory. Again another post for another day but basically it's a set routine of sit ups, push ups, planks and stretches that I spend at least 20 minutes of my day and if I don't I feel a bit awkward. Obsessive I know. But hey that's me.
So it really does beg the question... why can't I become just as obsessive with blogging? I guess it's because I go from one obsession to the next. Always have done (I think anyway) and think for the foreseeable future I always will do. Then I can sometimes break those little obsessions which is good in some cases but then I just seem to move on to something else.
I really hope that one day my obsession will be blogging because I know once I get into it I'll really be able to make a successful blog. One that's as good as all the other amazing ones I read. So many of the girls in the Her Campus blogger's network have such amazing blogs and it almost makes me depressed that I can't match them. Well I say can't. I can. I just don't. Or is it won't? Oh I don't know. Maybe I'll sort myself out. Maybe. Probably not anytime soon though.
Will I ever get my act together? Will I ever be the success I want to be?
Emily x
PS: Sorry for the post being all a bit too personal and negative. I know I know, I don't post for ages and when I do it's a personal rant in a way. I do deeply apologize to any readers out there. I will one day be better I promise!
Thursday, 18 July 2013
Her Campus National Intercollegette Conference 2013
Hello ladies,
Now this is something that I have been dying to tell you about and if you haven't heard of it already, where have you been? Her Campus are holding their annual National Intercollegiette Conference and this year it's set to be the biggest and best yet! This incredible event is happening on Saturday 26th and Sunday 27th July in the good old Big Apple (New York City!) So if that's not enough of a reason to go I don't know what is! (Can anybody tell I've not actually ever been to New York before :() Therefore if like me, you've been deprived of this priviledge or even if you're a regular in the legendary city, attending this vent will be the perfect opportunity to go.
Okay so I may see you thinking, why else would we want to go to an event like this? Well other than the fact it's being run by the brilliant Her Campus brand but you'll also get to experience an inspiring weekend full of keynotes, panels, and workshops on everything you need to make it in the media world plus lots more. So if you've ever even considered working in this industry then this will be the ideal opportunity to network with industry leaders and other collegiettes from across the US and some even international ones like myself!
What's more is all attendees will receive a fantastic goody bag full of freebies. As well as getting to experience lots of various activities and events from mini manicures, a braid bar, an exclusive BCBGeneration sample sale, 'Girl Rising' film screening all while enjoying some very tasty treats from Chipotle! So you'll leave feeling pampered, revived, knowledgeable, full from all the delish food and quite frankly in one of the happiest moods you've ever been in! I'm excited by just the thought! But be warned ladies! Tickets are selling like Hot Cakes! If you want to go the the National Intercollegiette Conference then you need to register ASAP!
The link to sign up for each day are below:
The Saturday July 27 Conference is for Her Campus team members only. Register here.
The Sunday July 28 Conference is for Her Campus team members & readers. Register here.
But as I said they're selling out fast so make sure you grab your tickets now! Would also like to give special thanks to Her Campus partners, Intel, BCBGeneration, Josie by Natori, Merck, Chipotle and Amtrak for their support!
Hope to see you there!
Emily x
Now this is something that I have been dying to tell you about and if you haven't heard of it already, where have you been? Her Campus are holding their annual National Intercollegiette Conference and this year it's set to be the biggest and best yet! This incredible event is happening on Saturday 26th and Sunday 27th July in the good old Big Apple (New York City!) So if that's not enough of a reason to go I don't know what is! (Can anybody tell I've not actually ever been to New York before :() Therefore if like me, you've been deprived of this priviledge or even if you're a regular in the legendary city, attending this vent will be the perfect opportunity to go.
Okay so I may see you thinking, why else would we want to go to an event like this? Well other than the fact it's being run by the brilliant Her Campus brand but you'll also get to experience an inspiring weekend full of keynotes, panels, and workshops on everything you need to make it in the media world plus lots more. So if you've ever even considered working in this industry then this will be the ideal opportunity to network with industry leaders and other collegiettes from across the US and some even international ones like myself!
What's more is all attendees will receive a fantastic goody bag full of freebies. As well as getting to experience lots of various activities and events from mini manicures, a braid bar, an exclusive BCBGeneration sample sale, 'Girl Rising' film screening all while enjoying some very tasty treats from Chipotle! So you'll leave feeling pampered, revived, knowledgeable, full from all the delish food and quite frankly in one of the happiest moods you've ever been in! I'm excited by just the thought! But be warned ladies! Tickets are selling like Hot Cakes! If you want to go the the National Intercollegiette Conference then you need to register ASAP!
The link to sign up for each day are below:
The Saturday July 27 Conference is for Her Campus team members only. Register here.
The Sunday July 28 Conference is for Her Campus team members & readers. Register here.
But as I said they're selling out fast so make sure you grab your tickets now! Would also like to give special thanks to Her Campus partners, Intel, BCBGeneration, Josie by Natori, Merck, Chipotle and Amtrak for their support!
Hope to see you there!
Emily x
Monday, 1 July 2013
Friday Favourite... on a Monday!
Hello,
A little while ago I used to be obsessed with an online community (I won't say what one in case that's not allowed as all content posted within the site was supposed to be kept strictly confidential!) But anyway one of the things they always had was known as a 'Friday favourite'. Now this is where basically you can write about your 'favourite' of whatever the topic was that week. Sometimes there wasn't even a topic and it was literally whatever was your favourite something that you wanted to share with everyone else. So I thought I'd include one (even though I know it's not Friday!) but seeing as it's just for my blog it doesn't matter what day of the week it is...
Anyway this time I'm going to mention my new favourite dessert!...
I've just discovered the Muller Light Desserts! Omg they're amazing! I have a particular passion for White Chocolate so when I saw the White Chocolate Muller Light Dessert I couldn't really resist! So glad I didn't resist it as well because it's actually so so nice! It's just the right amount of creaminess and indulgence yet isn't too thick or sickly! Would recommend anyone gives these a try! Even those that are on a summer diet as they're only 99 calories and 2 grams of Fat! Almost too good to be true in my opinion :D
Has anyone else tried them yet? :) Or is there something else that I'm missing out on?
Emily x
A little while ago I used to be obsessed with an online community (I won't say what one in case that's not allowed as all content posted within the site was supposed to be kept strictly confidential!) But anyway one of the things they always had was known as a 'Friday favourite'. Now this is where basically you can write about your 'favourite' of whatever the topic was that week. Sometimes there wasn't even a topic and it was literally whatever was your favourite something that you wanted to share with everyone else. So I thought I'd include one (even though I know it's not Friday!) but seeing as it's just for my blog it doesn't matter what day of the week it is...
Anyway this time I'm going to mention my new favourite dessert!... I've just discovered the Muller Light Desserts! Omg they're amazing! I have a particular passion for White Chocolate so when I saw the White Chocolate Muller Light Dessert I couldn't really resist! So glad I didn't resist it as well because it's actually so so nice! It's just the right amount of creaminess and indulgence yet isn't too thick or sickly! Would recommend anyone gives these a try! Even those that are on a summer diet as they're only 99 calories and 2 grams of Fat! Almost too good to be true in my opinion :D
Has anyone else tried them yet? :) Or is there something else that I'm missing out on?
Emily x
Saturday, 29 June 2013
Never finishing what I start...
Hello Ladies,
I know it's been a while. I hate that I always do this. I hate the way I'm so so unorganized. It's not that I don't have the ideas or the inclination to blog as believe me I do! I have pages and pages of notes of things I think I should blog about. Or stuff that I find amusing and want to write more about. Plus several unfinished articles all sitting waiting to be finalized and posted. But do I ever do any of them? No. I'm useless!
It's any wonder this blog is even still running! I will never know how I get any readers at all! I bet it's always a complete revelation to see something has actually been posted on here! I would like to say I'd change. I'd like to be able to promise to post every week. Even just once a week. But to be honest I know it's not true. I always end up with four billion other things to do and before I know it I've not gotten round to it again! Why do I do this?
It makes me wonder if my brain is just powered not to finish anything that I start? Well in terms of blog posts anyway!Which is even more annoying because I hate people that do that! Which in a way means I kind of hate me! This is not good! I really shouldn't be so self hating! Grr! Maybe actually finishing a blog post for once will make me feel better! Who knows?
I think I may in fact be classed as the Worst Blogger ever?! I love writing. I love blogging. I love connecting and socializing and sharing a passion! But I just fail at posting and getting my act together! Frustration doesn't even come close to describing it!
How do other bloggers do it?! How do they dedicate so much time! Anyone care to share some tips?
Till next time... could be a while...
Emily x
I know it's been a while. I hate that I always do this. I hate the way I'm so so unorganized. It's not that I don't have the ideas or the inclination to blog as believe me I do! I have pages and pages of notes of things I think I should blog about. Or stuff that I find amusing and want to write more about. Plus several unfinished articles all sitting waiting to be finalized and posted. But do I ever do any of them? No. I'm useless!
It's any wonder this blog is even still running! I will never know how I get any readers at all! I bet it's always a complete revelation to see something has actually been posted on here! I would like to say I'd change. I'd like to be able to promise to post every week. Even just once a week. But to be honest I know it's not true. I always end up with four billion other things to do and before I know it I've not gotten round to it again! Why do I do this?
It makes me wonder if my brain is just powered not to finish anything that I start? Well in terms of blog posts anyway!Which is even more annoying because I hate people that do that! Which in a way means I kind of hate me! This is not good! I really shouldn't be so self hating! Grr! Maybe actually finishing a blog post for once will make me feel better! Who knows?
I think I may in fact be classed as the Worst Blogger ever?! I love writing. I love blogging. I love connecting and socializing and sharing a passion! But I just fail at posting and getting my act together! Frustration doesn't even come close to describing it!
How do other bloggers do it?! How do they dedicate so much time! Anyone care to share some tips?
Till next time... could be a while...
Emily x
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